Union
by TivaAPLightning
Summary: 3 days after the kiss that changed their lives, Freddie and Sam have barely spoken to one another. How will they deal with the sudden change in their relationship? Who will they lean on for support? And what does Carly think about it? A journey full of love, loss, and heartbreak. Slow burn Seddie. Mentions of self harm and other potentially dark material.
1. Chapter 1

**Union**

_Sam's POV_

Of course. Of fucking course. This would happen to me. Stuck in an elevator with my occasional acquaintance, mostly enemy turned punching bag Fredward Benson.

Hello, my name is Sam Puckett and I have the shittiest luck in the world.

But it's not because I'm stuck in this elevator. Not really anyway. It more has to do with the person that I'm stuck with at the moment.

That nerdy kid who keeps pushing the emergency button and muttering about how technology has failed him? I kissed him the other night. Yeah I know, I can't believe it either. I wasn't planning on it, trust me.

It's all Freddie's fault. If he hadn't created that damn machine, he wouldn't have ever known I was in love. If he hadn't known I was in love, then he wouldn't have given me that speech about making a move. I hate to say it but he's pretty smooth when he wants to be. I don't know what I was thinking.

There was this moment, this one millisecond where I thought maybe he might feel the same way. That vanished pretty quickly the second I saw his face. A mixture of shock and horror I presumed. I can't say I blame him. If there's one thing I know how to do, it's hide my feelings. I'm Sam Puckett after all.

Still, "it's cool", was not the response I was hoping to get from the guy I love. Now you may be thinking, why would I fall in love with someone like Freddie Benson?

To be honest, I wish I wasn't. That would make this elevator ride much easier. But I am. I know I antagonize Freddie but we actually make a really great team. We compliment each other perfectly, like a dog and a bone or me and a large piece of meat.

This is common knowledge but Freddie is ridiculously intelligent. And not just about tech stuff. Politics, science, animal rights, the history of the butter sock etc. You name it and Freddie knows about it. But that's not what really attracted me to Freddie.

Nor was it his ever improving looks. He's always been cute but at some point in the last year or two, puberty hit that boy hard and in a good way. He's always been insecure so it's nice to see him gain some confidence.

Oh and another thing. Freddie is loyal to a fault. Always has been and always will be. No matter what I do to him, he is always going to be around in my life if I don't push him out. That's my favorite part of him.

I haven't had many reliable figures in my life. I won't even get into my parents. There's Carly but even I can foresee an eventual conclusion to our friendship. She'll move to LA or New York and promise to keep in touch as she launches her career, but in the end I'll just be a footnote on a Wikipedia page.

With Freddie, it's different. He's someone I could see myself with at 10, 25, and 70. I could see Freddie being the one I call to bail my ass out of jail one of these days. Or Freddie could be the guy who buys me chinese food after a breakup. Or the one who goes for a run with me at 5AM because he knows I need to get something out of my system but don't like to be alone in the dark. That's just the kind of guy Freddie is.

Not that it matters now. Any chance I had at a 'real' friendship with Freddie flew out the window the second I kissed him. And now here we are.

It's been 3 days since that kiss and I'm pretty sure we've said approximately 3 words to each other. The universe has decided to punish me again which is no surprise. The universe has been punishing me simply for existing for a while now. I successfully managed to avoid Freddie completely at school and yet here we are.

I should've taken the stairs. It's only 8 flights. I may not be a fan of exercise but I could've managed it.

Why didn't I check the elevator before I hopped in just as it was about to close? Why did I kiss Freddie anyway? And what did I do in my past life to deserve this?

I would've continued my internal ramblings if not for another source of rambling. The boy has decided to give up on pushing a button to save him from this awkward situation.

My next instinct was to check my phone but of course I had no bars. People weren't meant to place calls from elevator shafts. Thanks again, world. It's dark but I can still feel his eyes piercing a hole through me. Nope. No way. I am not having this conversation now.

_Freddie's POV_

I have come to the realization that I don't have very good luck.

To be fair, I should've realized this when I broke my chin at age 6 by slipping on a treadmill. Or when my pants ripped in the middle of the 4th grade music and my mom ran onstage with new ones. Or even that time I accidentally convinced my teacher I was a drug addict. I meant the soda, not the drug but I'm pretty sure that cost me a few points in that class.

But this situation may just take the cake. Being stuck in an elevator with Sam. Sounds like something I'd have nightmares about. In fact, I'm pretty sure I have had nightmares about this scenario.

But for once, my ambivalence towards being alone with Sam has nothing to do with a threat of pain.

Physical pain, at least.

Sam kissed me 3 days ago at school. I don't know why. We've hardly exchanged a glance since then. I knew she was in love but could that person really be me?

From conversations I've had with Carly, that seems to be the case. Granted, she was as shocked as I am. Strike that, no one was as shocked as I was.

It's crazy right? Sam Puckett, tormentor of the geeks, could actually have feelings for one of them? I will admit that Sam and I have gotten closer over the last year or two. Our friendship is maintained more out of enjoyment than necessity but we're still several giant steps away from love.

Could Sam really love me? This is all just a horrible misunderstanding, right? God, why did the elevator choose this moment to fail? Stupid technology. I spend so much time on you and you desert me when I need you the most.

Not that technology has done much for me lately. The Internet doesn't really have a section on finding out how Sam Puckett feels. Hell, I don't even know how I feel. Is it really possible for me to like Sam?

There have been moments, very brief moments, where I thought it might be possible. There was the whole twins thing. I still haven't quite got that figured out. And when she came to me about Missy. I felt this urge to save her. Oh yeah and there was that night on the fire escape.

But that meant nothing right? It was just to get our first kiss out of the way. At least that's what we told ourselves. Maybe there is more to it. The possibility of dating Sam wasn't one that crossed my mind often.

But it's something that I have to think about sooner or later. I really doubt that Sam and I can go the rest of our lives avoiding each other. Nor can we pretend that everything is normal.

She kissed me and I said it was "cool." How pathetic is that? Regardless of my feelings that may or may not exist for Sam, no one deserves that kind of answer. God, I'm so stupid when it comes to girls.

Plus Sam has always confused the hell out of me. No matter how hard I try. Whenever I think I know the answers, Sam changes the questions. She keeps me on my toes and I enjoy that. She's honest, brash, resourceful, hilarious, and wait a minute why am I complimenting Sam?

I need to get out of my own mind but I can't do that when I'm stuck in a dark elevator with the girl whose causing my stress. Stupid technology. I looked at Sam and she averted her eyes. I knew she didn't want to talk.

And knowing her, she would sit in this elevator in silence for as long as she needed to. I'm pretty sure she'd take out her own tongue to avoid this conversation. That was Sam for you. But this is something that needs to happen one way or the other. Freddie to base camp: I'm going in. Wish me luck.

**A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for reading. This is my first chapter in what is hopefully a long, fulfilling Seddie journey. Please let me know what you guys think. I love praise and criticism.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Union Chapter 2**

_**Neutral POV**_

"No." said Sam.

Freddie looked at her in surprise. "I didn't even say anything yet!"

"You didn't have to. I've known you for years, I can read your expressions, jackass."

Freddie sighed in frustration. That sounded like Sam. How was he supposed to get Sam to talk about the incident? _I figure the first step is getting her alone. Luckily the universe has already taken care of that for me. _Of course, that didn't make this potential conversation any easier. Freddie and Sam didn't have the kind of friendship where they divulged their intimate feelings towards one another. It's not the way they worked and it suited both of them just fine. _But now she's kissed me and everything has changed. But why?_

"Sam, listen I-" Freddie began.

"Didn't I tell you I didn't want to have this conversation?" Sam cut him off abruptly.

"Well we have to talk about it sooner or later. We can't spend the rest of our lives pretending it didn't happen!" Freddie exclaimed.

"God, Freddie, why do you have to make such a huge deal out of everything? It happened. It was one kiss. It didn't mean anything." Sam replied.

"Of course it meant something, Sam! Otherwise, it wouldn't have happened!" Freddie said.

"That's the most ass backwards logic I've ever heard in my life." Sam declared. "Why don't you put as much energy into getting us out of here as you do into analyzing 7 seconds of your life and maybe I'll be able to do something more enjoyable with my day." Sam added.

Freddie reluctantly acknowledged that she had a point. They didn't have anything to eat or drink and it was a wise move to try and figure a way out of this predicament. _That doesn't mean this conversation is over_ Freddie thought privately.

"I think I know how to get out of here but I'm going to need your help" Sam reluctantly admitted.

"I'm all ears." Freddie sighed. "What's your plan?"

"I'm going to need you to lift me up." Sam answered.

"Lift you up?" Freddie asked. "Where are you going with this, Sam?" he asked nervously.

"Oh for fuck's sake, get your mind out of the gutter, Benson." Sam retorted. Freddie couldn't see her that well but he was pretty sure she was glaring at him. "I need you to lift me up so I can push through the top of the elevator." she explained.

"First of all, that is not what I was thinking. Second of all, gross. Third of all, there is no way that is going to work. Even if we break through, what if the elevator starts working again? We'll be trapped." Freddie exclaimed.

"Do you have a better idea, Fredweird?" Sam retorted.

"Freddie. My name is Freddie. Is that really so hard for you to say?" Freddie said.

"Yes, actually it is. If I called you by the same name every day, how else would I express my creative juices?" Sam said.

"You know, some people find outlets for that sort of thing without hurting other people's feelings. See, this is exactly why people don't like you." Freddie responded.

The second it came out of his mouth, Freddie knew it was wrong. The light may have been dim but even he could see that Sam was affected by what he said. Her shoulders slumped and it looked like the fire had been completely taken out of her eyes. _Shit_ Freddie thought to himself.

"Listen, Sam, I didn't mean th-" Freddie started.

"Are you going to help me or not?" Sam cut him off.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" Freddie hesitated.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" Sam mocked. "Of course I'm not sure if this is going to work. But it's sure as hell better than being stuck here with you."

Freddie was silent at that. He knew he screwed up. They were in a delicate place right now and he just had to put his foot in his mouth. "Fine, let's give this a shot." Freddie acquiesced.

With the aid of Freddie, Sam managed to climb fairly close to the top of the structure.

"C'mon Freddie, put some muscle behind it. I can't reach the top." Sam complained.

"Sorry but you're not exactly light as a feather" Freddie said.

"Are you calling me fat, Benson?" Sam remarked and Freddie grimaced. Not only had Sam pushed her shoe into his head as retaliation but he had put his foot in his mouth again. He tried to be a good guy but clearly lacked social grace. It didn't help that Sam twisted every word of his.

"I swear once I get out of there, I'll make you regret th- woah!" Sam lost her balance and tumbled to the ground along with her graceless companion.

"Son of a..." Sam commented while looking at her arm.

"Holy shit, you're bleeding" yelled Freddie, still trying to regain his composure.

"Yeah I can see that." stated a much calmer Sam.

"Why aren't you freaking out then? Freddie exclaimed.

"This is not the first time I've dealt with bloody arms, Benson. It's just a scratch, it'll heal in no time." Sam remarked.

"What are you talk-" Freddie began but was interrupted from a ringing coming from his pocket.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me, your cell phone is working!?" Sam exclaimed in anger. "This whole time, you could have called someone to get us out of here and you wait until now. Real considerate of you, Benson." Sam snarled.

Freddie felt like a deer stuck in headlights. It had honestly not even occurred to him to use his cell phone. For a technological wizard, he could certainly be absent-minded on occasion. He checked his phone. It was his mother. No surprise there. He was supposed to be home 30 minutes ago.

To be fair, he wasn't far. He was in the right building, just the wrong location. With reluctance, he answered the phone.

"Hi Mom...yes I know it's 5 o clock...the AV club meeting ran late...I'm on my way now...Love you too." Sam snorted as Freddie finished up his conversation.

Freddie rolled his eyes and dialed the desk downstairs. Luckily, it wasn't Lewbert's shift so he had a chance of receiving legitimate help. Several minutes later the fire department was on it's way. They were going to survive this encounter.

Sam and Freddie sat in silence aside from the occasional shifting. Both were tired from the ordeal and had a lot on their mind. Before long, they could hear the sound of the door cracking open. Freddie and Sam were escorted out of the elevator as unceremoniously as they had arrived. They walked together without a sound from either of them. As they reached their respective destinations, Freddie's apartment and Carly's, they entered without any playful banter. Their current state of confusion had not been eased any more by the events of the last hour. But as Freddie closed the door behind him, he thought to himself that the journey of his and Sam's relationship had only just begun.

**A/N: Short chapter here but wanted to get it out quickly. Happy to see the response on the last chapter was generally positive. All reviews are welcome :) Just remember that this is only the beginning of the story for our confused friends.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Union Chapter 3**

_Freddie's POV_

As Freddie thought about his latest encounter with the blonde-headed demon, he couldn't help but sigh. It had now been 74 hours since Sam kissed him, 4 since they were stuck in an elevator together and he was still no closer to figuring out anything.

Usually when he was confronted with an unfamiliar situation, Freddie would think it over for some time, maybe create a pros and cons list and make a decision. But there were no pros and no cons in this dilemma because Freddie wasn't entirely sure what he was choosing between. He didn't know how Sam felt and he sure as hell didn't know how he felt.

_Well maybe you should figure that out _said the little voice in his head.

"How do I feel about Sam?" Freddie wondered aloud. He thought about it for a few moments but banged his desk in frustration when no words came to mind. He was supposed to be the smart one. He needed advice, and fast. But where was he supposed to get it?

His mother? Not likely. If she heard that his lips had touched Sam's, she'd run screaming for the nearest bar of soap.

Carly? Probably not a good idea. Anything he said to Carly would probably end up getting back to Sam and the last thing he needed right now was to put his foot in his mouth again.

Gibby? Not exactly a relationship expert.

Spencer? …..Spencer. That's it. Who better than someone whose known Sam and I for years and can provide a (relatively) unbiased opinion. Freddie sent out a quick text to Spencer asking him to come over. Sam and Carly were likely at the apartment and he needed to figure out his feelings before anything else.

30 seconds later, there was a knock on the front door. Spencer had helped them out of situations before but this was perhaps the most complex of them all. Freddie really hoped that Spencer had a few tricks up his sleeve this time.

_Neutral POV_

"Well it's about time, Freebo." Spencer said as he sat down on the couch. "I've been waiting on that text for 4 days now."

"Wait, you know about me and Sam?" Freddie asked.

"Of course I knew. You and Sam practically live in our loft. When you don't show up for days, and Sam and Carly start being secretive, I know something is up." Spencer deduced.

"Wow Spencer, it appears I have underestimated you." Freddie admitted, impressed. It took him a minute but Freddie found his voice.

"So...about Sam... what do I do, Spencer?" Freddie asked with hope in his eyes.

Spencer couldn't help but laugh. Ah, the perils of young love.

"Listen Freddie, you can't overanalyze this situation or else you'll just drive yourself crazy. Think about the facts. You and Sam have been friends for years. You know she's in love. You know she kissed you. What does that tell you?"

"That she's...in love with me?" Freddie stated with hesitance. Spencer's look affirmed his statement.

"But that's impossible! This is me and Sam we're talking about!"

"Exactly why it makes sense, Freddie. Don't you get it? You and Sam couldn't be more perfect for each other." Spencer exclaimed.

"Perfect for each other!? Are you high? Freddie asked incredulously.

"Freddie, you spend most of your life with two teenage girls. How is it possible you don't pick up even the most basic of signals?" Spencer shook his head.

"Signals? Are you referring to the verbal abuse or the physical abuse?" Freddie retorted. "If I'm in love with a teenage girl, it would be Carly not Sam." Freddie asserted.

Spencer gave Freddie a look that indicated otherwise. "Freddie, come on. Let's be honest. Are you really in love with my sister?" Spencer asked.

"Of course I am, I've had a crush on her since the 5th grade." Freddie answered.

"And that wasn't what I asked." Spencer answered back with a knowing look.

Freddie had to hesitate. Did Spencer have a point? Freddie had crushed on Carly since the beginning of time. But did he truly love her? He had to admit that the answer wasn't as easy as it used to be. 3 years ago, Freddie would have said yes without a second thought. But things have changed a lot since then.

First there was the fire escape. That was a huge moment in the development of their friendship. If you could even call what they had friendship. They fought constantly. Their friendship was more like a game of one-upsmanship. But Freddie had never seriously considered the possibility of a romantic relationship with Sam. He still had eyes for Carly, right?

"The answer is no by the way" Spencer interrupted Freddie's internal monologue.

"Huh?" Freddie asked.

"You're not in love with Carly anymore, Freddie. In fact I'd say it's likely you never were." Spencer stated. "Think about it for a second Freddie. Do you rush across the hall every time you hear the jingling of housekeys? Do you go out of your way to see her during the school day? Join clubs simply because she's in them? Even talk to her every single day? Freddie, you were never in love with Carly. Carly was your dream girl. You were infatuated with the idea of her. That's all."

By the end of Spencer's discussion, Freddie's jaw was hanging out. First, because he was wondering when Spencer got so eloquent and how he seemed to know Freddie's mind better than Freddie.

Second, because everything Spencer said actually sounded...plausible. Freddie knew, at least on a subconscious level, that his romantic interest in Carly was waning. He had been on the occasional date and routinely checked out other girls. But even if by chance he was over Carly, did that mean he was in love with Sam? Not at all.

"You may have a point about Carly, Spencer." Freddie admitted. "But that doesn't mean I like Sam. I mean who are we kidding here, Spence? The girl lives to torture me." Freddie remained steadfast on that opinion.

Spencer shook his head in amusement. "Freddie, you are one of the most intelligent people I know and you can't see what's staring right back at you. Haven't you and Sam grown closer over the last couple years?" Spencer gave Freddie a knowing look.

"Well yes but-" Freddie began.

"And does she really hit you that much anymore? Not that I've seen. You two have spent a lot more alone time together than you used to. There was a time where you only tolerated each other out of a mutual respect for Carly. Then you started the web show and became friends and now here we are today." Spencer finished. "If you were watching like I was, you could have seen this coming from a mile away." Spencer added.

Freddie wasn't sure what to think. Spencer had several valid points. I suppose it wasn't a complete shock that Sam had feelings for him. But could he have feelings for her?

"Spencer, I don't know how I feel about Sam." Freddie admitted. "What if I don't think of her that way? I don't want to lose her friendship for good." Freddie confessed. _I guess I do care about Sam _Freddie thought.

Spencer laughed to himself. "Freddie, you need time to do some soul searching obviously. That's understandable. But sooner or later you'll come to a decision. And I'm positive you won't be losing Sam once you do." Spencer remarked and stood up. "But don't wait too long. You and I both know patience isn't Sam's strong suit." Spencer commented which drew a smile from Freddie.

"That is certainly true. Thanks, Spencer. How is it that a guy like you seems to know more about me than myself yet still manages to set various objects on fire on a regular basis?" Freddie wondered.

"What can I say? I'm an enigma." Spencer said and seconds later he was gone, leaving Freddie with only his thoughts. It was time for him to talk things out with Sam. Freddie quickly flipped open his phone.

_Can we talk? _texted Freddie. Freddie waited a few minutes but no response came. With a sigh, Freddie closed his phone and shut off his light. His attempt may have been unsuccessful but Monday was on it's way. Sam couldn't avoid him at school forever. It was only a matter of time before they'd finally be able to discuss what happened. And maybe, just maybe, Freddie would find a way to figure out just how exactly he felt about Sam.


	4. Chapter 4

**Union Chapter 4**

** A/N WARNING: This chapter contains mentions of self harm. Also contains references to iSam's Mom.**

_Neutral POV_

_ Can we talk?_

The text message flashed across the screen of Sam Puckett's phone for what felt like the millionth time. It was sent at 9:34 P.M and Sam continued to stare at it almost 4 ½ hours later. She couldn't bring herself to reply. Why should she? She knew exactly what Freddie was going to say.

Freddie was going to be Freddie. He would be sweet and kind and tell her exactly how much he valued their friendship...until he broke her heart. Sam knew the second she kissed him that any semblance of a friendship with Freddie was gone. But she so desperately wanted to hold on to her fantasy. So if it took her acting passive aggressive and ignoring his attempts at conversation, so be it.

She had dated so sparingly in her life. Part of it was because she never truly felt deep feelings for a guy. She never got too close so she lost out on the experience. All in an effort to protect herself. Most people who walked into Sam Puckett's life eventually walked out.

Her parents, for instance. She hadn't seen the man she called "Daddy" in a decade. He went to the store to buy ice cream and never came back. And as for her mother? Pft. She'd have been better off being raised by wolves. The only interaction Sam had with her mother these days was her occasional drunken ramblings. Either that or being yelled at for daring to grace her with her presence without bringing excessive quantities of alcohol.

Consistency and love were not trademarks of Sam Puckett's life. Not that she believed she deserved it. Yet somehow, she had found herself a home with Carly and Spencer and someone she felt comfortable with in Freddie.

_And yet I still managed to completely fuck that up_ Sam thought to herself.

"I'm completely useless" Sam sighed to no one in particular. Carly and Spencer were long asleep and Sam was left alone with her thoughts, a prospect that was often quite dangerous. Sam absent-mindedly ran a blade between her fingers. Cutting was her release. Her sanctuary. Her escape from the outside world. She kept it from Carly. She would never understand.

The things Carly worried about on a day to day basis were not the things Sam worried about on a day to day basis. Sam loved Carly but had to admit she was a bit superficial. It wasn't a lack of trust, but rather an educated guess on the outcome that kept Sam's secret a secret. Well that, and many long sleeve t shirts.

Sam had toyed with the idea of letting someone in. Sam would die before admitting it but there were days where she wanted to do nothing but curl up in a ball and cry. But the risk outweighed the potential benefits with Carly. This brought her to Freddie. Freddie was significantly less superficial than Carly and his sense of loyalty meant that Sam's secret would be safe.

Sam hated to admit it but she had a fantasy of her and Freddie. A fantasy in which she could call him at 2AM and tell him she needed help and he would come running. It was unrealistic from the beginning but as she began to fall for the one stable male in her life, she began to believe in it. Hope, even.

That was before the kiss. Things have changed. Any confidence she had evaporated the second her lips parted from his and she saw his face. There was surprise but there was also disgust. So Sam did something that Puckett's never do. She ran away, both literally and figuratively.

They hadn't spoken since that night, with the exception of their rather harsh conversation in the elevator. Sam had spent the last 4 days trying to believe in her fantasy but she had come to the realization that she couldn't pretend anymore. Sam opened her phone which once again displayed Freddie's message. As the clock struck 3AM, Sam realized it was now or never. She knew the only shot she had at a truly honest conversation with Freddie was when he was least expecting it.

_Let's talk_ Sam texted. She waited a minute for Freddie to gain his bearings from the sleep she likely interrupted. She was not entirely surprised when she received a message a minute later.

_Now? It's 3AM. Can it wait until morning? _Freddie texted.

Sam wasn't surprised. That was awfully polite of him. She would have bitten anyone's head off who dared disturb her sleep at 3 o clock in the morning. But not Freddie. He was too nice for that.

_Fire Escape_ Sam texted back. It was a strategic move on her part. The words "Fire escape" had become a special message for them. It was a way for them to convey that the situation was important. Sam and Freddie had had several "Fire escape meetings" since the fateful night they kissed for the first time. As Sam silently made her way out of Carly's apartment, she remembered their last one.

_Flashback- 6 months ago_

Sam focused on taking deep breaths as she leaned against the railing of Bushwell Plaza. As she watched the streets of Seattle from the fire escape, she couldn't help but think that she could get used to this view. It was not one she could enjoy often. Sam didn't spend a lot of time on this fire escape. But with Carly away for the weekend, Sam sent a text she wouldn't have dreamed sending two years ago.

It wasn't a long text, only two words in actuality.

Fire escape.

But for Sam and Freddie, those two words held a lot of meaning. Sam wiped her eyes in vain. The falling raindrops would erase any evidence that she had been crying anyway. Freddie would be here soon. He always responded to this message.

On cue, she heard a knock and there he was. Sam motioned for him to come out and he joined her against the rail. For some time, they stood there, in a comfortable silence. Words would come but for now they weren't needed. There was an unspoken understanding between them that presence counted more than anything. Finally, Freddie decided to break the silence.

"I heard about the therapy box." Freddie said. A nod of acknowledgement on Sam's part indicated that Freddie knew why Sam had called him here.

"I don't know what Carly was thinking." Sam remarked with a laugh that didn't quite reach her eyes.

Freddie gave Sam a sympathetic look. "Well you know Carly. She gets these ideas on her head..." Freddie sighed. He had known it was a bad idea. Sam's relationship with her mom wasn't something she talked about but it was easy to glean that being trapped together would not help the situation.

"You know she meant well, right?" Freddie added trying to ease the situation.

Sam gave him a look of scorn. "Do you ever think of anything other than Carly?" Sam remarked.

Freddie sighed in frustration. That's not where he was going with this. "Sam, I'm just trying to keep the peace here."

"9 hours I was stuck in there with her" Sam said at almost a whisper. Freddie's brow furrowed but he quickly realized that they weren't talking about Carly anymore. He didn't interrupt her. Sam needed to get this off her chest.

"Do you have any idea how awful that was?" Sam continued. Her voice cracked but her mask remained intact.

"Believe me, I know a thing or two about crazy mothers." Freddie commented which drew a half smile from Sam.

"Looks like we have something in common after all, Freddie" Sam stated with a laugh.

"Any chance we can make Freddie my full time name?" Freddie grinned.

"Not a chance in hell, Freddicini" Sam grinned back.

"Hey that's a new one. What is that, a play on fettucine?" Freddie asked.

"I'm naming you after my favorite pasta. You should be honored." Sam declared.

Freddie couldn't help but laugh. "Only you, Sam. Only you. Do me a favor and never change." Freddie said.

Sam turned to look at Freddie now. Suddenly the atmosphere felt a whole lot more serious. The look that was exchanged between the two web stars held a thousand words.

It held Freddie's question. Was Sam okay?

It also held Sam's answer. I am now.

Sam nodded in acknowledgement of their silent conversation and motioned towards the window.

"I suppose you better get back before your mother has a panic attack." Sam commented. With a smile and nod, Freddie understood that this was his cue to leave. He moved towards the window but was stopped by Sam.

"Hey Benson..." Sam started and Freddie turned around.

"I won't if you won't." Sam added. Freddie smirked and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Goodnight Sam."

"Goodnight Freddie."

And with one more glance, he was gone and Sam was left alone with her thoughts once more. Only this time, she didn't entirely mind.

_End Flashback_

Sam couldn't help but smile at the memory. The fire escape had brought nothing but good memories for her and Freddie. But she had a feeling that this meeting may have a less satisfying conclusion.

On cue, there was a knock on the window and Freddie was there. He looked extremely disheveled, having been woken up in the middle of the night, but remained as cute as always.

"Well, here we are again, Sam." Freddie began stepping outside. "Let's talk." Sam took a deep breath and turned towards Freddie. Her long night was just beginning.

**A/N: You know the drill. Please let me know what you think :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Union Chapter 5**

_**Neutral POV**_

The tension in the air was palpable as Freddie sat down in the same chair he had once sat in 2 years ago. January 3rd, 2009. It was a date that neither would ever forget. Not only was it a first kiss for both of them but it signified a notable change in their relationship.

But that was 2009. This was 2011. But here they were again, on the same fire escape, trying to mentally prepare themselves for what was likely to be a very awkward conversation.

Sam could feel a knot building up in her stomach and she suddenly regretted this meeting.

"You know what, this was a mistake, I'm just going to go." Sam said as she made a beeline for the window but she was stopped in her tracks by the arm of Freddie Benson.

"Oh I don't think so. We've already put off this conversation for far too long. We're doing this and we're doing this now." said a surprisingly confident Freddie Benson. Even he was surprised by the conviction in his voice. Who was he trying to impress?

Sam reluctantly sat back down. If this was any other conversation, she would've bolted for the nearest escape. But she did wake the poor boy up in the middle of the night for this. And she had to admit that she was curious as to what he would say.

She was also scared to death of losing her friend, not that she would ever say that out loud. They spent what seemed like an hour averting each other's eyes before Freddie finally began the conversation.

"Why?" Freddie asked. He didn't need to expound any further. They both knew exactly what he was referring to.

The kiss.

A nervous laugh slipped out of Sam's mouth. She didn't even know how to respond to that question. How she was supposed to explain to a boy that barely tolerated her, that she loved him?

"Freddie, we really don't have to do this. We can go back to the way things were..." Sam pleaded at a volume that barely qualified above a whisper. She raised her head only to see Freddie shaking his.

"Sam, we can't pretend that it didn't happen." Freddie replied. There was a degree of calmness in his voice, but on the inside Freddie was anything but calm. He was pretty sure his heart was about to explode out of his chest.

"How do you know if you don't try?" Sam countered. Freddie gave her a knowing look. Sam was trying to buy time. He knew her well enough to know she was feeling trapped. He hated that he was the cause but this wasn't something they could afford to ignore any longer.

"Sam..." Freddie said with a soft glance. Sam knew her attempts at stalling wouldn't work. But she was hoping she could buy herself another 30 seconds.

"What do you want me to say, Freddie?" Sam asked.

Her emotions were spread clear across her face. She was a mess, internally and externally. This would usually cause her great distress but right now Sam didn't care. She just wanted to go to bed and not have to deal with this situation anymore.

_Why couldn't Spencer have built me a working time machine_ Sam thought to herself. If she could, Sam Puckett would re-do her entire week. She would never have kissed Freddie that night at school.

Maybe she would've kissed Brad instead. Brad was cute. She could've tried out a relationship with him in order to get over Freddie. But alas it was not to be. There was no time machine and there was no one to save her from her current situation.

"Sam, I just want you to tell me the truth. Is that too much to ask?" Freddie said softly.

Sam closed her eyes in disappointment. It wasn't too much to ask. If she were in his position, she'd have asked for the same thing. This was it. No more stalling. No more excuses. It was just her and Freddie.

"Fine, you want the truth?" Sam asked, taking on a louder tone. Freddie calmly nodded. He was expecting an outburst of emotion at some point and he had a feeling he was about to see it.

"The truth is that something has changed between us, Freddie." Sam began. Freddie's eyebrows raised slightly. It wasn't the sentence he was expecting but he motioned for her to continue.

"Look, I don't know when it started. It might have started when we kissed 2 years ago, hell it might have been before that. But somewhere along the way you stopped being Carly's nerdy neighbor and you started being one of my closest friends. And I don't have many of those, Freddie. We both know that." Sam stopped to catch her breath.

She already felt like she was about to have a panic attack and this conversation had barely begun.

"Do you think I don't know that, Sam?" Freddie interrupted.

"Of course our relationship has evolved. We're not the same people that we were 4 years ago, or even 2 years ago. You're right. There was a time where you were just a blonde-headed demon who was a pain in my ass. But that was yesterday. Today, you're one of the few people I can actually be honest with. You keep me on my toes, Sam. No one challenges me like you do and no one can make me laugh like you do. Do you honestly think that I don't value our friendship?" Freddie continued.

Sam's eyes widened a bit at that. Although Freddie was routinely openly affectionate when it came to Carly, Sam was always a different story. Freddie kept his feelings about Sam, whatever they may be, close to the chest as did she until the past week.

Sam had to admit that it felt nice to hear Freddie admit that he cared, in a roundabout way. But deep down, she already knew he cared about her as a friend. They wouldn't be having this fire escape chat if he truly hated her.

"I have a question for you." Sam replied and Freddie took a deep breath. If there was one text, one statement, one pause that made his breath hitch in his throat, it was that.

"Go ahead." Freddie said with a slight gulp.

Sam took a moment before responding. She wanted to make sure she worded it correctly.

"What about tomorrow?" Sam asked, which drew a confused look from Freddie.

"What are you talking about?" asked Freddie.

"You said that yesterday I was a pain in your ass. Today I'm one of your closest friends. What am I going to be tomorrow?" Sam asked Freddie. It was a loaded question, for sure and Freddie had a feeling that the way he answered this question could alter their friendship for good.

"What do you want us to be, Sam?" Freddie asked.

It was a deflection and they both knew it.

The truth was that Freddie didn't have an answer for Sam. What did he want for Sam and him's future? His brain hadn't quite arrived at a conclusion between his conversation with Spencer last night and his current conversation with Sam.

"I want...you to answer my question." Sam replied. Freddie couldn't help but sigh. He knew it would be tough to get Sam to confess anything, especially in his exhausted state, but this was frustrating.

"I'll answer yours if you answer mine." Freddie stated. It was a last ditch effort on his part but he managed to rationalize it in his head.

"I did answer your question." Sam contended.

"No you didn't. You explained how our friendship has evolved. You didn't explain why you kissed me." Freddie responded.

A shiver ran up Sam's spine and it wasn't due to the brisk Seattle weather. She internally cursed Freddie. At this time of night, she was hoping she would be able to get by without answering the question.

_I should have known never to underestimate Freddie's perceptiveness _Sam thought to herself.

"Alright you got me." Sam leaned back in her chair in defeat. Sam opened her mouth to continue but had a difficult time finding the words. She never was great at expressing her feelings verbally.

"Freddie, I really don't want to ruin our friendship." Sam remarked.

"Who said any of this has to ruin our friendship!?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Well how else do you see this conversation ending, Freddie?" Sam was yelling by this point. "You really want to know the truth? Fine. Well here it is. The reason why I kissed you at the lock in is because I like you, you jackass. And not in the schoolgirl crush type of way either. It's more like lava exploding out of a volcano. That is what has changed between us. There. I admit it. Are you happy now, Benson?" Sam exclaimed.

Freddie stood there in frozen silence. He knew he must've looked like a deer caught in headlights but he couldn't change his expression.

Sam Puckett just confessed that she liked him. In other news, the sun is now blue and pigs are flying in the skies of Seattle.

Freddie had acknowledged the possibility of this outcome in his thoughts, but hearing it out loud actually stunned him to the point of silence. Unfortunately for Freddie, Sam took his silence for another meaning entirely.

"Look Freddie, I don't expect anything back from you. I know you're in love with the always perfect Carly Shay. God forbid someone have flaws. We had a good thing going for a while, Fredward. Thanks for ruining it." Sam proclaimed and before Freddie had a chance to blink, she was gone.

Freddie closed his eyes in frustration. "Fuck" he yelled to no one in particular and swatted aimlessly at a side table.

His lack of experience with women had cost him again and this time it could cost him his friendship with Sam. Freddie briefly thought about going after her but there was no way Sam would let him in now.

Freddie checked his watch which now read 4:30 A.M. He sighed in frustration. He was never going to sleep now despite his exhausting last 24 hours. It was hard for Freddie to believe that him and Sam had been stuck in an elevator just 12 hours ago.

Luckily for him, it was the weekend which meant he could sleep in. It also gave him more time to think about how to resolve his situation with Sam.

There were several options for the confused teenage boy. And Freddie knew he had no choice but to make the right one.

**A/N: Well here is chapter 5. Hope you guys enjoyed it. Please let me know what you think :) Even if you just want to tell me you think it sucked, anything constructive is appreciated.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Union Chapter 6**

_Neutral POV_

As the alarm clock blared on Freddie Benson's nightstand, he couldn't help but let out a groan. Not only would the annoying sound refuse to stop disturbing his rest, it also brought a message. It was now Monday morning and there was nowhere else for Freddie to hide.

He could sit on his computer and pretend that nothing had occurred between Sam and him, on a Sunday. But on a Monday? Not as lucky.

Freddie wouldn't be able to avoid Sam and she wouldn't be able to avoid him. They had 2 classes together, not to mention lunch which was sure to be awkward at best.

With a sigh, Freddie turned off his alarm and started his day. He had spent the last week in his own mind, pretending that he had no idea how he felt.

That changed today. Today, Freddie Benson was taking control. He knew exactly what he needed to do.

Freddie peeked around the corner and had to breathe a sigh of relief. The row of lockers were rather empty, with the exception of his brunette neighbor. The trio had lockers next to each other, a decision which was now coming back to haunt Freddie.

As he approached, Carly gave him a look of annoyance.

"Look at that, he lives!" Carly exclaimed in a fake salutatory voice. Freddie grimaced. He had ignored Carly's texts all weekend.

"Sorry Carls, I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts for a little while." Freddie replied.

"Well, I can understand that..." Carly conceded. "You haven't had the simplest week."

"Yeah, no kidding." Freddie shook his head.

"Sam told me about the elevator." Carly remarked.

"Yeah that was an...interesting experience." Freddie commented.

"So...have you made a decision yet?" Carly asked with a hopeful look on her face.

"I have." Freddie nodded.

Carly waited a few seconds but Freddie didn't continue. "Well?" she asked.

Freddie couldn't help but chuckle. "You'll find out when everyone else does."

"Seriously?" Carly asked. "You're not going to give me anything?"

"Can't risk it." Freddie grinned. "See ya in chemistry."

With a wink, Freddie was gone. Carly couldn't help but sigh. She hoped Freddie knew what he was doing.

"Get anything out of him?" a voice asked from behind and Carly couldn't help but gasp.

"Jesus, Sam, you gotta stop doing that." Carly remarked.

"Carly, you knew I was around the corner." Sam rolled her eyes. "So, did you learn anything?" Sam asked in anticipation.

"Not a thing." Carly admitted and Sam's face fell. "Sorry, Sam. Looks like he's keeping this one to himself."

Sam couldn't help but be disappointed. While not necessarily surprised, it still hurt. If Freddie had decided something that would benefit her in the long run, he would've told Carly.

_Looks like this ship has sailed_ came a voice from inside Sam's head.

Sam had to admit that the little voice was right. At this point, it was pretty clear. Freddie didn't feel the same way about her as she did him.

_It's probably my fault_ Sam said to herself. She was the one who tortured the poor boy on a regular basis. Sure, they had shared one kiss two years ago but that was just so Freddie could stop being teased. Sam thought she was foolish for falling for someone who clearly had no interest in her.

_I'm always the second choice_ Sam lamented. Whether Freddie had feelings for Carly or not was irrelevant; it was clear he did not have feelings for her.

Her internal monologue was broken by fingers snapping her face. Oh, right, Carly. They were still in the middle of a conversation.

"Earth to Sam!" Carly exclaimed. "The final bell just rang, we have to go. Are you going to be okay?" Carly asked with a concerned look.

Sam managed to eke out a half smile. "Yeah, I'll be okay. You go on ahead, I'll catch up with you later." Sam stated.

For Carly, a girl who had maintained perfect attendance each of the last 3 years, Sam's explanation was enough. But Sam had no intention of catching up with Carly at the moment.

Having little desire to interact with the boy who was currently cutting her so deep, Sam took an alternate route that led her to the backdoor of the school.

It required a password to exit. Luckily, Sam had 'borrowed' an access code from one of her former teachers. 5 seconds later, Sam was out on the warm streets of Seattle. And she knew exactly where she was headed.

As the bell rang signifying the start of homeroom, Freddie Benson felt relaxed for the first time in a week. Freddie had finally come to a decision with the Sam situation and felt at peace with it.

His calm demeanor faded seconds later when Carly rushed into homeroom and took her seat – alone. Sam, the cause of his stress and sleepless nights was nowhere to be found.

"Carly, where is Sam?" Freddie whispered as Carly took her seat next to him.

"She said she was right behind me." Carly replied.

Freddie rolled his eyes. "And you believed her?" he hissed.

"Hey, don't blame me. She's not skipping homeroom because of me." Carly hissed back.

Freddie had to admit that Carly wasn't wrong. It stung but in all likelihood, it was his fault that Sam wasn't here. He just had to hold out hope that Sam would show up to the remainder of her classes.

As Sam took a step on the green, she had to stop and admire her surroundings. Shadow Wood Park, located in a little known suburb within Seattle, was her escape from the outside world.

Despite the somewhat ominous name, Shadow Wood Park was a beautiful area located on the banks of the Raritan River. As a young child, her parents used to take her here, giving her some of the best memories of her childhood.

It's relative anonymity meant that Shadow Wood Park didn't attract too many visitors. That's just the way Sam liked it. It was her place, in a world where she was increasingly losing things that she could call her own.

She could barely call the room she once occupied at her childhood house her own. She spent maybe 2 days a week there.

She couldn't call Carly and Spencer's apartment hers either. As much as she enjoyed staying there, she was ultimately just a guest.

Even the fire escape wasn't hers. It was Freddie's.

_Freddie_.

A word that had caused her a lot of stress lately. That's why she came to Shadow Wood Park. To get Freddie out of her mind.

When Sam was around Freddie, she didn't know how to breathe properly. That damn tech savant had her wrapped around his finger and he didn't even know it.

But none of that mattered now. The fantasy in her head wouldn't exist much longer. Sam couldn't foresee a conclusion to this situation other than the permanent end of her and Freddie's friendship. He might end up being 'the one that got away' but it would help Sam move on.

Sam sat down on a bench and reached into her pocket. Almost instinctively, she started twirling the blade she kept on her at all times, through her fingers. It wasn't in an attempt to hurt herself but rather a harmless release of emotion through a series of superficial cuts.

"You're going to hurt yourself." said a male voice from behind her.

"It's not like it would be the first time." Sam replied without turning around. Why should she? She knew exactly who it was.

"That doesn't make it any better. I don't like seeing you like this." the male continued.

"And I don't like when you do it to yourself either." Sam replied. "But at some point we'll just have to accept the fact that we both have problems that can only be dealt with in certain ways." Sam continued.

The male nodded in silent agreement. Sam had a point. "Mind if I sit?" he continued.

"It would be a bit rude if I said no, not that I care about that." Sam stated. "I did ask you to come after all." she continued. "Thank you for that by the way"

"Anytime, Sam. You know I'm not going anywhere." he said as he sat down next to her. "Now, what's troubling you?" he added.

Sam gave him a half smile. "Quite a few things, actually. But I can already feel them evaporating. You really do make me feel better about myself, Brad." Sam continued.

Brad turned towards his blonde-headed friend and smiled.

"That's what I'm here for, isn't it?"

_**A/N**_**: Here is chapter 6! Hope you enjoyed. We're just getting started on this journey :) Brad will be an integral character going forward, as upset as that may make people. **

**I will explain his connection to Sam and his backstory in the upcoming chapters. I may deviate from canon for him. Also, please remember that this story will contain mature themes. This means mentions of self harm, abuse, swearing etc. Let me know what you think so far!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Union Chapter 7**

_Neutral POV_

As Sam lay on the couch in the iCarly studio, she couldn't help but reflect on the last month. So much had changed for the young web star.

For what seemed like her entire life, Sam had been one third of the dynamic iCarly trio. She didn't have anyone else but she was okay with that because of the stability among the 3 teenagers.

First there was Carly, the intelligent, sweet, pretty host. Carly had a tendency to be girly and naïve but she was a good person and was someone Sam was happy and proud to call a friend.

Then, there was Freddie, the tech-savvy producer of iCarly. Once known solely for his nerdy ways, Freddie had become an integral part of the iCarly team and it's dynamic.

Then, there was Sam. The sarcastic and aggressive, yet loyal and lovable co-host. Although the group had grown up considerably since the show's beginning 4 years ago, the dynamic generally remained the same.

But as of late, a tangible shift had occurred, at least in the mind of Sam Puckett. Feelings she never wanted in the first place were overpowering her. Sam couldn't go to Carly about them for a multitude of reasons.

For one, Carly sucked at keeping a secret. Sam loved Carly and trusted her with her life but the girl had a big mouth.

Second, Carly was the object of Freddie's desires. That so much wasn't the problem as much as the fact that Freddie was occasionally the object of Carly's desires.

Freddie would probably dance in the streets if he found out but Carly had mentioned him in what may have been a romantic light several times over the last few years. Carly was fickle when it came to boys to say the least.

Sam didn't believe that Carly actually had significant feelings for Freddie but she had to admit there was a possibility of it. Thus, Sam had no choice but to tread lightly when it came to her own feelings for Freddie.

Feeling trapped, Sam sought the comfort of an unlikely source in Brad. When Sam first met Brad 4 months ago, he seemed like a nice, ordinary guy. But there was one tiny detail that Sam happened to notice during Brad's intern interview that was missed by her two co-stars: Brad was wearing a long sleeve t shirt.

This would mean nothing to most people but to Sam it was an indicator. Ordinary people didn't wear long sleeve t shirts in 85 degree weather. But Sam Puckett was not an ordinary person. Her perceptiveness far exceeded that of those around her.

Sam wore a long sleeve t shirt to cover a secret she had been hiding for several years now. The blade Sam carried around with her 24/7 had nothing to do with trying to protect herself, at least in the physical sense. She had her fists and an unusual amount of upper body strength for that.

The blade Sam carried with her was about protecting herself in the emotional sense. Her blade is what kept her from having a nervous breakdown on a daily basis.

Sam could see why the idea might be unfathomable to some. Hurting yourself in order to protect yourself? Sam could see why one might think her methods didn't make sense. But for Sam, her blade provided an escape that food and good television simply couldn't match.

And as it turns out, the same applied for the newest member of the iCarly team.

Sam watched Brad for several weeks after his interview. Although he was not given the job initially, Sam took an interest in him. Every day, without fail, Brad would show up to school in a long sleeve t shirt. If he felt like mixing it up, it would be a sweatshirt.

As Sam watched from afar, she couldn't help but be curious. The weather this time of year meant that it was implausible for someone to continuously wear long sleeve clothing and not overheat. She knew that from personal experience. Sam couldn't help but be curious about Brad.

During a time where her feelings about Freddie were constantly in flux, thinking about Brad was a way for her to distract herself. That's why when Cort was fired from the team, Sam suggested they bring Brad back for another interview.

Several days later, the iCarly trio became the iCarly foursome. Brad hung out with the group on a regular basis, and individually with Freddie.

Unsure if she was paranoid, crazy, or correct with her suspicions, Sam made an effort to join Freddie and Brad in their activities. This gave her a perfect opportunity to gauge if Freddie held any interest in her as well as get closer to Brad to see if her suspicions were right.

_Whole lot of good that did me _Sam thought to herself.

In an effort to better her friendship with her two co-stars, she only aroused suspicion, both from them and Carly. Before she knew it, it was time for the lock-in, the day where everything changed for the iCarly stars.

Not only did it change the complexion of the relationship between her and Freddie, but also the relationship between her and Brad, unbeknownst to Carly and Freddie.

At the time, Carly was convinced that Sam was in love with Brad and thus decided to give them some "alone time" by locking them in a room together. Sam remembered it like it was just yesterday

_Flashback- School Lock-in. 3 days before beginning of Chapter I_

As Sam pushed against the door for the 4th time, she had no choice but to admit defeat. Her and Brad weren't getting out of this classroom, at least not until Carly came to let them out.

Sam shook her head in anger. She should've worked harder to show Carly that she was not in love with Brad. Hindsight is hindsight but at least she wouldn't be stuck in here. Sam turned around to look at her friend who stood awkwardly in the middle of the room.

"Listen, Brad. I'm sorry to get you all caught up in the middle of this." Sam apologized. Apologizing was not something Sam did often but she felt it was warranted here.

Brad managed a half smile. "No worries. I suppose there are worse people to be stuck in a room with" Brad laughed.

Sam cringed a little, remembering how they ended up here. "Listen, Brad. I think you're a really nice guy but...I'm not in love with you." Sam stated awkwardly. She was realizing far too late that her snooping may have given Brad a certain impression.

To her immense relief, Brad laughed it off. "Don't worry about it, Sam. I wasn't trying to make a move on you. I know this is about Freddie." Brad boldly remarked.

Sam's eyebrows raised involuntarily. "What are you talking about?" Sam said with a nervous laugh.

Brad gave her a knowing look. "Sam, I haven't known you very long but I think a blind bat could see that you have feelings for the guy." Brad commented.

"Brad, you don't know what you're..." Sam begun but trailed off when she saw the unimpressed look on Brad's face at her weak lie. Sam wasn't sure if it was the uncertainty of the situation, or the emotions that had been clouding her judgment but Sam suddenly found herself admitting something that she had previously only admitted to herself.

"Alright, you got me." a tired Sam admitted. "I have...feelings for Freddie." Sam managed to get out before covering her mouth in shock.

Brad couldn't help but smile. "Don't look so concerned, Sam. Your secret is safe with me. Besides, I'm pretty sure your feelings are mutual." Brad added which made Sam's eyes light up.

"At the risk of sounding like too much of a girly girl, why do you say that?" Sam asked.

"Well, I think it's suspected by many because your interactions just scream true love." Brad began with a slightly sarcastic but truthful tone. "But in all seriousness, the reason I see that is because of his eyes." Brad continued.

"His eyes?" Sam asked in confusion. "What does his eyes have to do with Freddie's feelings?"

"Sam, whenever Freddie talks about you, there's a certain look in his eyes. I'd say it was a mixture of admiration, love, and respect if I had to describe it. I've known Freddie for awhile now and he doesn't get that look in his eyes just talking about anyone. It's you, Sam. You're the one. Even if Freddie himself doesn't know it." Brad finished.

"You're pretty perceptive, Brad." Sam complimented him. Brad's words were convincing but Sam was still far from sure. It seemed like an unrealistic possibility that Freddie felt the same way about her.

"I try." Brad said with an overly dramatic bow which drew a smile from Sam. "So what should we do until we're let out of here?" he continued.

Sam shrugged her shoulders. "Well you already know one of my deepest, darkest secrets so I guess it's time for me to learn more about you. 20 questions?" Sam asked.

Brad nodded his head in affirmation. "Sure, why the hell not?" he remarked with a smile.

And so, Sam and Brad spent the next hour learning various facts about one another. Sam, for example, learned that Brad was a black belt in karate, and started coding his own software when he was 11.

Brad learned that Sam had a surprisingly extensive collection of meat flavored items, and that she had a fantastic recipe for coconut cream pie. But eventually, asking about one's favorites grew tiring and Sam decided to kick it up a notch.

"When was the last time you cried?" Sam asked, catching Brad off guard.

"Going into the serious stuff I see." Brad remarked.

"Now, remember you have to tell the truth." Sam reminded him.

"Alright then, it was October 29th of last year." Brad replied.

"First of all, you remember the date? Second of all, why?" Sam asked.

Brad shook his finger. "Nope. That wasn't the question. Now it's my turn." he said.

"What is your worst fear? I mean a real fear, not the dark or bees or shit like that." Brad continued.

Sam knew the answer but hesitated. She didn't want to be the first to reveal anything that would make her look bad but she didn't want to lie either.

"Fine, I guess I'd have to say that my biggest fear is that one day I'll be all alone and no one will care about me or my life." Sam admitted.

She stood Brad down as she said it to gauge his reaction. She didn't want his pity and was pleasantly surprised that she didn't see pity in his eyes. In fact, Sam had trouble reading Brad at all. But her thought process would have to resume later; it was her turn to ask a question.

"Why did you cry last October 29th? Sam asked.

Brad had a quick response. "Because I was sad. Now it's my turn." he added.

"Oh no, no way." Sam interrupted. "I am not accepting that as an answer. It's against the rules." she declared.

"What do you mean it's against the rules? I answered your question!" Brad replied with a chuckle.

"Fine but I'm not answering any other questions until you answer yours." Sam crossed her arms.

It wasn't long before she got an eye roll out of Brad. "Fine, I'll answer your damn question." he conceded.

"The truth is that it was the anniversary of my sister's suicide." Brad disclosed.

Sam eyes softened immediately. That was not what she was expecting. "Jesus Brad...I'm sorry I even brought it up. I didn't know..." Sam explained.

Brad waved her apology off. "It's alright. Damn, I'm sorry, I didn't intend on getting emotional right now." Brad let out a nervous laugh as he wiped a small tear that had managed to escape his eyelid.

"Never apologize for your feelings." Sam replied. Sam reached out and touched her hand to Brad's. It wouldn't take the pain away but it was a small measure of comfort to the two web stars.

It was at that moment where they heard a knock at the door and seconds later a voice.

"Is is safe to come in?" Carly asked from outside.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yes, Carly."

"Sam, how are we going to hide the stripper and the dead body?" Brad whispered in a very loud voice.

"HIDE THE WHAT?" yelled Carly from the outside.

Sam and Brad couldn't help but share a smile. Neither of them were particularly emotionally composed at the moment but for right now, that was just fine with them.

**A/N: Apologizing seems to be in order. I am very very late with this chapter. Life gets in the way and I think I rewrote this chapter 7,000 times. It's not my best work but let me know what you think. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Union Chapter 8**

** A/N: This chapter is particularly dark. Trigger warning in effect. **

_**Sam's POV**_

_Son of a bitch _Sam thought to herself as she ran her hand through her hair. The tears had begun to fall despite Sam's best efforts.

_What the fuck did I just do? _That was the question that had been running through her head for the last 10 minutes.

Sam kissed Freddie. Freddie Benson. The tech producer of iCarly. The guy she loved. She let her emotions get the best of her and made an impulsive decision that she regretted now. Freddie couldn't have looked more shellshocked once their lips parted and Sam felt like a deer in headlights.

It was definitely not her finest moment.

But now, Freddie was gone, and Sam was left with only her thoughts, hiding in a dingy closet on the 3rd floor of Ridgeway High School.

Sam swore as another tear had the nerve to leave her eyelid. She could see her future now. Freddie would apologize but explain to her that he had no romantic feelings for her at all. They would drift and eventually become nothing more than acquaintances with a history.

iCarly would cease to exist and Sam would return to being just a face in the crowd. With no web show to tie them together, Sam would inevitably lose Carly and by proxy Spencer as well. Sam's world was about to come crashing down on top of her and she didn't have the slightest clue how to stop it.

With Carly and Freddie obviously out of the question, Sam dialed the only other number she currently trusted in Ridgeway High School.

_**Brad's POV**_

Brad continued to stare at his partner who had been strangely quiet since his return. They had planned to test out their love app on more people but Freddie seemed dismissive of the idea. Freddie fiddled with the equipment, clearly distracted. Something had clearly happened to his usually loquacious friend.

Just then, Brad felt a buzzing in his pocket and reached to take out his phone.

_Room 316. Alone. Secret. _the text read from Sam.

_Well that's rather cryptic_ Brad thought to himself.

"Hey, Freddie, I'm going to go check on Wendy's experiment and see if she needs any help." Brad said. Brad's flimsy excuse worked as Freddie waved him off with a shrug and some mumbling.

2 minutes later, Brad was at the door of room 316. With a knock, he entered and immediately found his blonde friend, standing with her back to him.

"Sam?" Brad asked. It was an unspoken question but one that was easily understood by the two teenagers.

"I didn't know who else to text." Sam remarked.

"Well you can always text me." Brad said trying to choose his words carefully. Although her back was to him, her body language screamed upset.

"Sam, what's going on?" Brad asked. The fact that Sam decided that he was the one she should text meant that something serious must have been going on.

"I kissed Freddie." Sam spoke in a voice so soft Brad wasn't sure if he heard her correctly.

"And...?" Brad replied. Sam obviously needed to get something off her chest.

Sam let out a sarcastic chuckle and finally turned around. Brad's eyes widened at her appearance. She looked nothing like the girl he had been locked in a room with several hours ago. I

f Brad didn't know any better, he would guess that Sam had just woken up. Her long sleeve t shirt hung loosely off her and her hair was rather disheveled. But when Brad looked at Sam's current state, what really drew him in was the look in her eyes. Usually, Sam's were full of light. These eyes looked empty. Red but empty.

Sam's whole appearance looked like the life had been taken out of her and all that remained was a skeleton. This didn't even cover the tears that stained her face.

"Sam, what happened with Freddie?" Brad asked cautiously. The look on Sam's face told him all he needed to know. It clearly had not gone well.

"It doesn't even matter." Sam sighed with a resigned look on her face. "I just destroyed one of the few decent friendships I had." Sam commented.

Brad opened his mouth to speak but it was tough for him to form words right now. At least that explained why Freddie was acting so weird.

"Sam, what did Freddie say?" Brad asked.

Sam shook her head. "He didn't need to say anything. The look on his face gave me his answer. I didn't need to stay and hear him try and explain how ludicrous it was that I had just kissed him." Sam explained.

"Sam, it's possible that he was just surprised. Maybe he-" Brad begun but was interrupted.

"Don't do that, Brad. Don't give me false hope." Sam warned him. "I didn't ask you to come here because I wanted you to assure me that Freddie has feelings for me." she continued.

"So why did you ask me to come?" Brad asked. The question hung in the air and Sam suddenly felt trapped.

"You know what, this was stupid, I'm sorry I dragged you here." Sam remarked and made a move for the door, only to find Brad standing in her way.

"Sam, you're not stupid and I'm glad you asked me to come." Brad confessed.

"You...are?" Sam asked trying to gauge her new friend. She hadn't learnt his lying tells yet so she only had his word to go on.

"Yes, Sam I am. Trust isn't easily given in this world. We may not know each other too well but I think you and I both know that." Brad declared and suddenly found himself face to face with Sam.

"Yeah, you've got that right." Sam said at a whisper.

"Sam, you're going to be okay." Brad asserted with a level of confidence Sam didn't share.

"Don't give me that crap, Brad. I think we both know it's not that simple." Sam replied with force.

Brad nodded in agreement. "You're right in a sense. I can't make guarantees. Sometimes life fucks with you and there's little you can do to take away the pain. But I believe you're strong enough to survive it anyway." Brad remarked.

"Well that's nice of you to have such confidence in me but if you really knew me, then you'd know I'm anything but strong." Sam replied.

"You're still alive, aren't you?" Brad observed and Sam hesitated.

"That doesn't prove anything." Sam replied. "You can be alive and still have no reason to live." she continued.

"Is that the case with you?" Brad asked and suddenly the room felt much smaller.

Sam didn't speak for a moment. It was just her and Brad here. That was a prospect that would've seemed scary not too long ago. I mean, how much did they even truly know about each other? They had just started hanging out within the last month. Was Sam really about to bare her soul to someone who might as well have been a stranger? Sam didn't know the answer to that question until it came out of her mouth.

"I have plenty to live for, Brad. That doesn't mean that life can't kick the shit out of you on a regular basis." Sam stated. Their tones were growing louder, unbeknownst to them. They were lucky to be in an empty part of the building.

"Do you think I don't know that?" Brad sarcastically asked. "My life hasn't exactly been a cakewalk. You just have to try and find a way to cope with the madness." Brad explained.

"And how do you cope?" Sam asked and suddenly it was Brad's turn to hesitate.

"I do what I have to do to get through the day." Brad yelled.

"Yeah, well, you're not the only one." Sam countered, bringing her voice down to a whisper. "We all have secrets, Brad. Part of dealing with the pain is letting them reveal themselves once in a while. Otherwise, the wounds aren't going to heal. And I mean that emotionally, not literally." Sam finished and Brad's eyes narrowed.

"What are you implying, Sam?" he asked with a slight tone of anger as well as a faint sense of fear.

"I'm implying that you and I are alike, Brad. We're not like other people. We have pain, real fucking pain. Pain that can only be eased in a few ways and covered up by unnecessary levels of clothing." Sam exclaimed.

"Like what?" Brad responded. He was starting to get where Sam was going with this.

"Like this!" Sam announced and before Brad knew what was going on, Sam had taken her shirt off, leaving only a bra, bare skin as well as various cuts, burns, and scars that covered her arms and torso.

"Jesus, Sam." Brad stated and looked away. Sam walked up to Brad and got in his face, forcing him to look at her.

"Brad, I'm going to be honest with you now. I'm scared to death here mostly because I just exposed one hell of a secret and you're free to tell the whole world now. But I think we have a connection here. And I think you and I have a hell of a whole lot more in common than blonde hair." Sam observed.

Brad backed away from her. "Listen, Sam, you don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what you're implying but I can tell you it's not true." Brad asserted.

His statement exuded confidence but his eyes did anything but. Brad was lying and Sam knew it.

"Fine, I guess I didn't make my point clear enough." Sam acknowledged and seconds later, Sam's pants were on the ground next to her shirt, revealing more cuts and scars that spread from her thighs and reached her feet.

"Do I need to go further or have I made my point?" Sam asked.

"Sam, you don't need to do this." Brad pleaded.

"Then just be honest with me, Brad." Sam implored with a whisper. Brad sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

"Fine, Sam. You want to go there? We can go there." Brad responded and took off his sweatshirt, exposing his arms that were covered in various bruises and scars.

Next came the shirt, which exposed a chest that had clearly seen it's fair share of bruises and blades. "Are you happy now?" Brad yelled. "Now you know the truth. Honesty still seem like a good idea to you?" he continued.

Sam's face couldn't help but break into a half smile. "Brad, think before you answer this. How do you feel at this exact moment?" Sam asked with a look that insisted he tell the truth.

Brad took a moment before responding. "I feel...liberated." he admitted with a confused glance. Sam laughed at Brad's confusion. He had no idea what to do with his feelings right now. To be fair, neither did she. The whole night had left her as an emotional wreck.

"Then it looks like we have something in common after all." Sam revealed.

It had been a miserable night for the young web stars. But standing in room 316, with their secrets and their bodies exposed, both of them couldn't help but feel that a change was coming. And not an entirely unwelcome one either.

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter. This wraps up my little Brad/Sam backstory. Now we'll be back in present time so you'll see more of Freddie and Carly. Don't worry, this story is about them too! Please give me your thoughts :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Union Chapter 9**

_**Neutral POV**_

Freddie sighed as he stared at Carly's door. Sam hadn't showed up to the rest of her classes. That didn't necessarily mean that Freddie couldn't talk to Sam today. There was a good chance that Sam was just beyond that door. She might've been sitting on the couch, a mere 10 feet away.

Freddie briefly considered knocking but ultimately decided against it. If Sam wanted to talk to him, then she would talk to him.

As Freddie entered his apartment, he couldn't help but feel completely helpless. He had a good plan for the day but he didn't count on Sam deserting the premises.

Now Freddie was stuck with a basket of feelings he couldn't explain and an awkward friend situation he couldn't solve. Wait, that wasn't true. Freddie knew how he felt, even if he didn't want to admit it. Now he just needed Sam to see it.

_You know what, fuck it_ Freddie said to himself and got up off his couch.

In a rare moment of unbiased introspection, Freddie admitted that he had spent the last few days acting like a whiny bitch. It was time for him to take charge, and for real this time. He had been saying this for a while now but this time he meant it.

With a sudden surge of confidence, Freddie walked across the hall and opened the door without knocking, startling the two occupants inside the apartment. Unfortunately for Freddie, neither of these two occupants were Sam, only Carly and Spencer.

"Do any of your friends actually have homes they go to?" Spencer rhetorically asked his sister before retreating to his bedroom.

Carly shrugged. "What's up, Freddie? she asked.

"Uhh...is Sam here? Freddie asked awkwardly. His newfound confidence had seemingly disappeared once he realized Sam's absence.

"Never came home from school." Carly remarked in dismissive fashion. While it wasn't unlike Sam to skip classes, Carly had never become particularly fond of her habit.

"Mind if I hang out here awhile?" Freddie asked and Carly nodded in response. Carly was tired of the tension that had plagued the trio over the last week. The sooner Sam and Freddie resolved their issues, the better.

"Did Sam say where she was going or when she would be back?" Freddie asked hopefully.

"She wouldn't answer any of my texts" Carly replied.

Sam was not exactly number one on Carly's list right now. Not only had she lied about coming to homeroom, she had ignored her attempts at communication all day long. Carly hated when Sam did this. She would separate herself from the world to go be alone somewhere and not answer any forms of communication.

What if something important had happened? And what if Sam got hurt? Carly wouldn't be able to help her because she had no clue where or with whom Sam went on these little excursions.

Both teenagers sighed. It was still Monday which meant they should be starting to prepare for Saturday's iCarly, but with Sam and Brad absent, the two web stars had no choice but to wait.

Almost on cue, they heard a jingling of keys and Sam walked into the apartment and she did not arrive alone. Brad had accompanied her home, each of them holding a smoothie from The Groovy Smoothie.

"It's about time, guys." Carly sarcastically commented while simultaneously rushing over to hug her blonde-headed delinquent of a best friend.

"Sorry we're late, Carls. We just stopped off to get some smoothies after school before rehearsal." Sam stated with confidence. While they had stopped to grab smoothies, Sam and Brad both knew that wasn't what brought them together on this day.

"Bullshit." said Freddie who had been quiet up to this point. He got up from the couch to join his trio of co-stars at the door.

"Both of us know you didn't go to school today, Sam." Freddie stated. His face was calm, cool, and collected but his body language screamed that he was anything but calm.

"Yeah, no shit, Benson" Sam retorted with a roll of her eyes. "I didn't mean it literally, at least not for me. I met Brad on my way here." Sam explained.

Freddie shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think so. Brad came to school today but he didn't show up to AP English 7th period, now why is that, Brad?" Freddie asked, turning his attention to his tech-savvy friend.

Before Brad could answer, Sam interrupted him.

"What exactly are you trying to say, Fredweird?" Sam got right in Freddie's face. The tension in the room was palpable.

"Guys, let's just take a step back here." Carly interjected, trying to calm the tension to no avail.

"I have no intention of backing down." declared an obviously frustrated Freddie. "Now why don't you tell me what you two really did today?" Freddie continued with fire in his eyes.

Sam took a step back with a surprised look on her face. "Are you...jealous, Freddie?" she inquired with a smirk. She knew exactly what Freddie was thinking and since Brad had the intelligence not to interrupt her, she figured she might as well see how it played out.

"No, I am not jealous, I'm pissed off." Freddie rolled his eyes. "Some of us actually show up to rehearsal, not to mention school!" Freddie yelled, directing his attention towards both Brad and Sam.

"First of all, we're only like 25 minutes late so stop getting your panties in a tightwad, Benson." Sam begun. "Second of all, Brad and I can do whatever the hell we want so why don't you shut it." Sam continued.

"Guys, let's not fight..." Carly tried to play peacemaker but Freddie and Sam were just getting started.

"Oh why not, Carly?" Freddie asked sarcastically. "If Sam, wants to play then let's play. Let's recount the facts. Sam leaves school 10 minutes after arriving. Brad shows up to school and mysteriously leaves halfway through the day. Both of you arrive late, carrying a smoothie from the same restaurant. So obviously you were together the entire time." Freddie easily deduced.

Sam rolled her eyes again at Freddie's deduction. "Congratulations, Freddie. You have figured out the most obvious clue in the universe. Why don't you tell me tonight's lottery numbers too, since you're such a genius?" Sam countered.

"Why don't you tell me tonight's lottery numbers." Freddie mocked Sam.

"Oh real mature, Freddie." Sam responded with a snarl. "What are you, 5 years old?" she continued.

"Even at 5 years old, I was still smarter than you'll ever be." Freddie retorted.

"Fuck you, Benson. Just because I don't spend every waking moment studying doesn't mean I'm not just as intelligent as anyone in this room. Oh wait, I'm sorry. Did I say every moment? I meant every moment except for the time your mother gives you a tick bath each night!" Sam returned.

The back and forth between Freddie and Sam was growing tiresome and Carly finally decided to put a stop to it. Too busy arguing with one another, Sam and Freddie didn't notice the air horn that Carly had retrieved from her brother's room. Seconds later, the horn blared throughout the apartment forcing Sam and Freddie (and a well prepared Brad) to cover their ears.

"Damnit Carly, would you turn that off?" yelled Freddie and Carly acquiesced.

"Well it was about time you two stopped arguing. Don't you see what's happening here? You two have so many unresolved issues that you're getting mad with each other over nothing. I don't know what the hell has gotten into all of you but I'm tired of it. When you guys decide to act like mature adults, I'll be waiting. Now I'm going to go watch old episodes of Spongebob with my brother." Carly snapped and seconds later she was gone with a slam of the door, leaving the remaining trio in the living room.

"Look, maybe Carly has a point." Brad finally opened his mouth. "Is all this fighting seriously necessary?" he continued.

When he received only mumbling for responses, he continued his attempt at peacemaker.

"The answer is no, by the way, especially when you consider the reason why you two are fighting. For god's sake, Freddie. I know exactly what you are thinking went on between Sam and I today and it didn't. There was no sex, no kissing, no anything, so get over yourself and your jealousy." Brad begun, stunning Freddie. Brad was rarely so open.

Before Freddie could respond, Brad was talking again. "And Sam. Don't torture Freddie. He doesn't deserve it. You two both know exactly what this argument was really about and it has nothing to do with skipping school or tick baths." Brad continued.

"I'm with Carly on this one. You two need to grow up and for once in your life be honest with each other. Until you do that, I'm out too." Brad declared and walked right out the front door, leaving Freddie and Sam alone.

"See what yo..." Sam begun but Freddie waved her off.

"Don't bother Sam, they're completely right and we both know it." Freddie admitted with a sigh. Sam didn't want to admit anything but she acknowledged he was right with simply a nod.

"What are we gonna do about this, Sam?" Freddie asked. It was the most subdued either of them had been all day.

"I have no idea, Freddie." Sam said with a shake of her head. This had not been the easiest day for her.

"If you don't want to move forward, can we at least go back to the way things were before this mess?" Freddie asked. His intentions were sincere but his words still stung.

"Freddie, I have spent my whole life focusing on my mistakes in my past. I have no intention of going back anymore." Sam admitted with a distant glance.

"Goodnight, Freddie." Sam abruptly finished their conversation and went upstairs, leaving Freddie alone in Carly's apartment.

As Freddie heard sounds of laughter coming from Carly and Spencer in the other room, he hoped to himself that one day, him and Sam could reconcile some kind of relationship.

**A/N: Hey guys. Here's chapter 9. I noticed both in the reviews, private messages, and view counter that people didn't seem to be a fan of the last 2 chapters. I am always willing to change things up so let me know what you think. I know the Seddie has been light thus far but it's "slow burn" for a reason. Again, let me know what you guys think, good or bad :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Union Chapter 10**

_**Neutral POV**_

_5:25 P.M, April 14__th__, 2011. _Sam read the bottom of the text message from her neighbor turned love interest before scrolling back up to read his words.

_I'm sorry, Sam. Fire escape tonight? Time to be honest. I'll be waiting_. 13 words was all it took for Sam's heart to start pounding.

_Why do I let this boy do this to me? _Sam thought to herself. She was tired and stressed and she had no desire to endure any more heartbreak this week. It had been just over 28 hours since her argument with Freddie and the remainder of the iCarly team.

The typically unbreakable bond that they had shared had been pierced. Not shattered, at least in the realm of her, Carly, and Brad. Sam wasn't worried about them. They would be fine within a couple of days. Carly always forgave Sam and Brad wouldn't hold a grudge over something minor. Unfortunately, Sam was less sure about the 4th member of their squad, Freddie Benson. Their relationship had certainly deteriorated in the course of the past week.

While Sam and Freddie were no stranger to arguing, it typically contained a tone of playful banter. There was always an unspoken agreement to never go too far. Sam may have insulted Freddie's technological intuition and Freddie may have spoken about her unhealthy love of bacon and fatcakes but that's as far as they went. There was no mention of the issues that plagued them deep down.

Freddie never mentioned how Sam seemed to live with her co-star and not her parents. Sam never mentioned Freddie's insecurities and his own issues with his parent. They valued each other's companionship, whether they admitted it or not and did not want to upset the balance. That all flew out the window the moment Sam kissed Freddie at the lock in.

And now Sam feared that her relationship with Freddie was irreparably damaged. Their fight last night didn't echo their previous fights. In Sam's mind, they acted more like enemies about to wage war than comrades having a disagreement. The words may not have changed but the tone had certainly been a lot darker than usual.

And now here they were a day later, and Sam was fretting over the only attempt at communication made by Freddie. They had become quite skilled at avoiding each other in school. It was almost like a game of chess in Sam's mind and Freddie had just made a pivotal move.

_Fire escape tonight? Time to be honest. _

Sam read the words over and over again trying to process them. Their last fire escape meeting had not gone particularly well. It ended with Sam walking out on Freddie at 4:30 in the morning. It was hard for Sam to believe that she had done that only a couple of days ago. Each day was like a 50 round title fight between the two of them.

"That phone must hold the secrets of the universe." a voice interrupted Sam's thoughts. Sam looked up in surprise. Her visitor was not one she was expecting.

"Brad, what are you doing here?" Sam asked in confusion.

"I was worried. You didn't pick up your phone." Brad admitted sheepishly. A quick glance at her notifications showed Sam that she had missed 3 calls and a text message from Brad. She frowned, disappointed in herself. She had been focusing on Freddie's message for far too long.

"Sorry about that, Brad. Kinda been caught up in my own mind here." Sam admitted. The apology wasn't needed but served a symbolic gesture. An unspoken agreement of a truce that was initiated by Brad's arrival.

"So what's on your mind, tiger?" Brad asked as he plopped into a beanbag chair next to Sam.

"Not much, I'm just tired." Sam replied but Brad shook his head.

"Try again." Brad gave Sam a knowing look.

"How do you know I'm lying?" Sam asked out of curiosity.

Brad chuckled to himself. "3 reasons Sam. First of all, you've kept one eye on your phone since I've gotten here. Second, given what's going on and the fact that you didn't answer my calls, I would say that you're pretty deep in thought. Third and most importantly, you have a tell." Brad commented.

Sam's face scrounged up in disappointment. "I do not have a tell. I'm a great liar." Sam remarked.

"Who are you trying to convince?" Brad said with a chuckle. "You're a good liar but I'm more perceptive than most people. Not to mention I'm a liar myself so I know exactly what to look for in a tell." Brad explained.

Sam's eyes raised and she gave him a nod. "Well, Dr. Brad, it appears you have me all figured out." Sam commented sarcastically.

"You know it, darling." Brad stated in a overly fake accent. Sam laughed at Brad's attempt at humor and a silence followed. Between Brad and Sam, silences were never too awkward. They hadn't known each other particularly long but they were comfortable with one another, a result that did not come easy to either of them. Blame it on vulnerability and a desire for connection but Sam and Brad had developed a very quick but stable friendship.

Sam had to admit that she had started to lean on Brad quite a bit. She was not the kind of person who leaned on anyone. She was Sam Puckett, the strong warrior, but even the strongest of wills were capable of breaking. And if someone had to be around to pick up the pieces, Sam could take solace in knowing that Brad was that person.

"So what's really on your mind, Sam?" Brad asked with a fairly serious look on his face. This was always the hard part for Sam. She was so used to internalizing her feelings that she didn't know how to talk about her feelings with another human being. How pathetic was that? But Brad was here and he understood so before she knew it, Sam felt herself spilling her secrets.

"It's Freddie." she admitted with a sigh.

Brad smirked slightly. "When is it never not Freddie?" he asked and received an eye roll from Sam for his troubles.

"Oh shut up." Sam threw a harmless stage prop that just missed Brad's head.

This was a common feature in their little chats. At some point or another, someone would do something to break the tension of the situation. Brad and Sam may have been comfortable with each other but their long-standing insecurities meant that protecting themselves was a necessity.

"I got a text from him today." Sam admitted.

"Ah so that's why you're obsessing over your phone." Brad nodded which drew another look of ire. Sam wasn't truly angry with Brad but had to play the part.

"Fire escape tonight. Time to be honest. I'll be waiting." Sam repeated Freddie's text message and Brad nodded.

"Glad to hear Freddie took my advice about being honest." Brad commented and Sam shrugged.

"Even if he's honest, that doesn't mean anything positive about my future." Sam asserted with confidence. She had zero hope that their eventual encounter tonight would be anything but negative. At some point, she would head over there but not yet. If she knew Freddie, and she did, then he would sleep out there to ensure he didn't miss a possible appearance from her. If Freddie was anything, he was loyal. That was one of the most endearing qualities about him, according to Sam.

"You know you have to hear him out." Brad gently pushed. Sam nodded in somewhat reluctant agreement.

"I know I do." Sam said and then got quiet. "Brad, I can't take this anymore." Sam confessed. There were no tears and no smearing of makeup. In fact, if Brad hadn't detected the slight inflection in her voice, he probably could have passed off her comment as a simple fact, like the fact that the sky was blue.

"If he breaks your heart, I'll break his face." Brad cracked his knuckles which made Sam laugh.

"Do you want me to come with you, Sam?" Brad asked. Sam hesitated before answering. She had to admit that it would make her comfortable to have Brad to turn to if things went south.

"No. This is something I have to do myself." Sam asserted.

Brad nodded in understanding. "I get that. This is your battle, not mine. I won't follow you then. Unless you're into that." Brad commented with a smirk. Sam rolled her eyes at Brad's meager attempt at flirtation. There was nothing to it, at least to the best of her knowledge, but Brad did provide some entertainment so she let it go.

"Alright, let's go." Sam commanded and rose from her beanbag. She headed towards the door but stopped when Brad didn't follow her.

"Aren't you going home, Brad?" Sam asked in confusion.

Brad scoffed at her logical assumption. "And leave you here alone after your important meeting with Freddie? That's a bad idea and you and I both know why. I'm not going anywhere, Sam." Brad asserted.

His tone made it clear that Sam had no choice in the matter. Sam couldn't help but flash Brad a half smile as a thank you. The ironic part of his declaration was that neither Sam nor Brad technically lived in this apartment. Sam made a mental note to thank Spencer one day for allowing her to stay here for as long as she had.

"Okay, well then I guess I'll be back." Sam stated. She hesitated briefly but with a nod from Brad, she pushed herself through the door. Brad sat back in his chair, fairly pleased with himself. He only hoped that Freddie would be honest with himself as well as Sam. If Freddie didn't return Sam's feelings, it would shatter the iCarly team. This meeting could change their lives and it's participants barely even knew it. Brad sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He had a feeling this was going to be a very long night.

**A/N: Hey guys here is chapter 10. Hope you enjoyed! I want to establish Brad and Sam's friendship hence the fairly centric chapters. Next will be very Freddie/Sam heavy. Sorry for the delay in updating. Just moved into college and it's been tough. So again, please let me know what you think :). **


	11. Chapter 11

**Union Chapter 11**

_**Neutral POV**_

The silence was deafening for Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson. It was not necessarily an uncomfortable silence but one brought on by the understandable uncertainty of the situation.

For Sam Puckett, this was it for her and Freddie. With a little nudging from Brad, she brought herself to the fire escape where she first kissed the man, who now sat several feet away from her, two years ago. The tension of the last week was about to reach it's conclusion.

For Sam, she was certain that it would result in the dissolution of her friendship with Freddie. She never wanted it to come to this. She would have preferred to remain friends, even if it meant she had to keep her feelings to herself. It would surely torture her but Sam didn't care. She didn't want to lose one of the few people in her life who had stuck with her.

For Freddie Benson, it was time to be honest. They kissed and the dynamics of their relationship changed. It was a reality that they had to deal with at some point.

Freddie and Sam had spent the last week fighting and dodging each other. There was the elevator incident, one that had become almost an afterthought at this point. There was the argument in Carly's apartment. That one was particularly vicious. There was the 4:30 A.M fire escape conversation, highlighted by misunderstandings. And now here they were on the very same fire escape.

The tension needed to stop, in the mind of Freddie Benson. They had come too far to see their relationship degrade into a battle of wills. It was time to put up or shut up and Freddie knew what he was going to do. That's why he was the one who broke the silence between him and Sam.

"I didn't know if you'd ever come." Freddie admitted softly. It was a true statement on his part. He may have had a plan but his plan depended on Sam actually arriving.

"You and I both know I don't turn down fire escape." Sam replied. The word fire escape meant so much more to the two teenagers than a metal staircase. Freddie nodded in understanding. There was a part of him that was confident that Sam would show up, despite all the pain that they had put each other through over the last week.

"You've been avoiding me." Freddie remarked. He looked over at his blonde co-star and suddenly everything felt very real. They weren't simply in the same location at the same time. Sam couldn't watch the stars and play with her fingers any longer.

"I know I have." Sam admitted. Why lie at this point? Sam knew she had put off the inevitable for days now. It was time to be honest with one another and move on with their lives.

"Why?" Freddie asked. It was a simple, one word question but Sam had to choose her words carefully.

"You know why, Freddie." Sam replied.

"You're scared." Freddie continued. It came out like a statement but his tone suggested it was a question.

"I don't want to lose you." Sam confessed. She couldn't bring herself to look Freddie in the eyes. She felt vulnerable, something she didn't particularly enjoy.

"Who said you're going to lose me? We're just talking." Freddie remarked calmly.

Sam was anything but calm. "Oh, cut the bullshit, Freddie. You and I both know that this isn't just any conversation. This is THE conversation. The one we've been putting off since the moment I kissed you. So why don't we just get it over with already?" Sam yelled.

"Well sorry for taking my time on one of the most important conversations in my life." Freddie yelled back. This risked becoming a shouting match but neither cared. There were emotions that needed to be released.

"Listen, Sam..." Freddie began but stopped when Sam held up her hand. With a resigned sigh, she began to talk.

"Look, Freddie...we don't need to do this. We both know where this is going. And I don't particularly want to hear it. So why don't I just go and we're done?" Sam commented. She waited but no response came from Freddie. With another sigh, Sam made a move for the window but was interrupted.

"You asked me what I wanted us to be tomorrow." Freddie remarked, recalling their last conversation on this fire escape.

"Yeah, so?" asked an exasperated Sam. If Freddie was about to go on a tirade about how he wanted them to go back to the way things were, she was going to hit him.

"I've thought about you a lot over the last week, Sam." Freddie admitted. "If I've realized anything, it's that I have absolutely no desire to re-visit the past. We need to focus on the future. In the past, you'd walk out at this point and I would let you. That changes now. Sit down, Sam." Freddie continued and stood up to prove just how serious he was.

Sam was almost scared by the look on Freddie's face. Usually rather jovial, Freddie looked more serious than Sam had ever seen him. With some reluctance, Sam sat down so Freddie could continue.

"I told you that it was time to be honest, Sam. And I think I'm finally ready to admit this." Freddie began. The hairs on the back of Sam's neck were standing up straight. She felt a chill go down her spine, as she waited for Freddie to continue.

"Sam, I..." Freddie trailed off, unable to form the words that seemed so simple in his head.

"Before I'm 80 would be nice, Benson." Sam snapped. Freddie glared back at her and her expression softened.

"Sorry." Sam murmured an apology and Freddie nodded in confirmation that she was forgiven.

"Sam, I didn't bring you here to end our friendship." Freddie confessed. Sam's eyebrows raised in confusion.

"Listen, Freddie. That's sweet and all but I can't do this fake friendship thing." Sam replied.

"Good. Because I have no interest in having anything fake with you." Freddie responded. Sam was getting tired of this back and forth with her and Freddie.

"Freddie, you're talking in circles. What happened to your whole honesty thing?" Sam asked.

Freddie couldn't help but chuckle.

"Sam Puckett." he addressed her while rising from his chair. Caught off guard, Sam began to back up but Freddie had a different idea in mind.

"How can someone so creative and so intelligent be so fucking blind to what's right in front of them?" Freddie commented. Sam's eyes widened. Not only did Freddie swear, but he suddenly seemed more bold than he had in their many years of friendship.

"Uhh...Freddie where are we going with this?" stammered out a suddenly nervous Sam. It was as if a switch had been flipped in their dynamic. Freddie was the one in control now. '

"Sam, I didn't bring you here to tell you that I wanted to end our friendship. I brought you here to tell you this. Sam, you are admittedly one of the craziest people I have ever met. You antagonize me on a regular basis and yet you intrigue the hell out of me. You're also one of the most hilarious and loyal persons I've ever met. You think in shades and gray. You're interesting, Sam. The day I met you is the day I hit the jackpot in the lottery of life. Yes I know exactly how corny that is so don't even say it. I didn't ask you to come here because I wanted to end our friendship. I asked you to come here because I wanted to tell you that I love you too." Freddie finished his speech leaving a stunned creative genius in front of him.

"You...what?" Sam asked, too overcome with emotion to form a complete sentence. Freddie gently put his arms around the waist of Sam.

"Sam, I'm telling you I want to be with you." Freddie admitted as his eyes deadlocked with Sam's.

"Freddie, if you're joking, I'm going to throw you off this balcony." Sam deadpanned. Freddie smirked.

"Sam, do you see any cameras around anywhere? It's just you and me on this fire escape. That's it. It's always been you and me and I have a feeling it always will." Freddie continued. His voice was quivering with emotion at this point.

"What about Carly?" Sam asked with hesitation. Freddie gave Sam a sarcastic look.

"Sam, you don't have to worry about Carly. I have no romantic feelings for her whatsoever. The only girl who I have romantic feelings for is standing right in front of me." Freddie added.

"Really?" asked Sam in disbelief.

"Well, and Victoria Justice but I don't think she counts." Freddie remarked. Sam's eyes lit up and without warning, she embraced Freddie. She had a real concern that she was in some sort of alternative universe but she wanted to savor the moment.

"This is real, right?" Sam asked Freddie. If this was a dream, he would tell her, right? Wasn't that how dreams worked?

"This is 100% me." Freddie whispered into her ear. That was all it took for Sam Puckett to feel, for the first time in a very long time, content.

As Brad paced back and forth through the iCarly studio, he couldn't help but feel anxious. Sam Puckett was one of the few people who Brad had made a connection with since he moved to Seattle. Now, she was out on that fire escape, potentially having her heart broken.

Sam had been gone for almost an hour. There was no way they were still talking, were they? What if Freddie had hurt her and now she was somewhere in the middle of Seattle hurting herself?

_No. She promised she would come back _came a voice from inside Brad's head. Brad banged the table in frustration. If there was one thing he couldn't stand, it's when his friends got hurt unnecessarily.

"Damn it to fucking hell." Brad muttered out loud. He couldn't help but be frustrated by this whole situation.

"Someone needs anger management classes." came a voice from behind Brad. Brad whirled around to find his brunette co-star.

"Sorry Carly, I didn't see you there." Brad admitted with a sheepish grin.

"Yeah well I do live here even if every teenager in this neighborhood seems to occupy this space whenever they want." Carly ranted.

"I'm sorry, Carly. I was just waiting for Sam but I can go if you want." Brad motioned towards the door.

"No, don't worry about it. Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something." Carly replied.

"Sure, what's up?" Brad responded.

"You and Freddie are pretty close, right?" Carly asked. When Brad nodded in affirmation, she continued:

"Does he ever say anything about me?" Carly delicately inquired. "You know...in the romantic sense." Carly finished and Brad's head snapped up.

"Carly, where are you going with this?" Brad implored. He didn't want to believe what Carly was intimating to him. She couldn't possibly be implying...with the situation between Freddie and Sam?

"Listen, Brad. If I tell you this, you have to promise not to tell Freddie, okay?" Carly swore him to secrecy. Out of curiosity and a growing sense of fear, Brad agreed.

"Brad, I think I have feelings for Freddie." Carly confessed.

And just like that, the dynamics of the famous foursome had once again word, which had once seemed so simple, had become very complicated.

**A/N: Hey guys, here is chapter 11. Hope you guys enjoy! I foreshadowed this a few chapters ago, I think some of you got it. I think the complexities of the romantic triangle were never really explored in the show so I like to explore it. I'll try and keep the characters as they are and not cliché it up but let me know what you guys are thinking. Thanks for reading.**


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